3204. This young woman brought her child into Children's Hospital for
a routine check-up. On the records, the nurse saw that the
child's first name was Urine (pronounced Urin-ie). Not wanting
to be rude, but wanting to know why this woman would name her
child this, the nurse asked her how Urine got her name.
The woman explained, "Well, my baby was born premature and
had to stay in the special nursery. She was real sick and
they didn't know if she would make it. I couldn't decide what
to name her, but the nurses said they would pray for her. One
day I came in and the nurses had already named her. There was
this paper on her incubator that said 'Please save Urine', so
I knew that they had named my baby."
1637. The Easterner had always dreamed of owning his own cattle ranch,
and finally made enough money to buy himself the spread of his
dreams in Wyoming.
"So, what did you name the ranch?" asked his best friend when he
flew out to visit.
"We had a heck of a time," admitted the new cowboy. "Couldn't
agree on anything. We finally settled on the Double R Lazy L
Triple Horseshoe Bar-7 Lucky Diamond Ranch."
"Wow!" his friend was impressed. "So, where are all your cows?"
"None of 'em survived the branding."
1268. Upon answering the door to her whorehouse, the madam was surprised to see an
"Look at yourself," the madam said, "no arms, no legs, what could you
The amputee replied, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"